Drabbles and Advent shorts in the Beyond His Control verse
by Leydhawk
Summary: I can't let go of this verse, so here's my prompt fills for various writing challenges on tumblr. If you want the smutty ones, you'll have to go read them on AO3. I may continue posting drabbles here whenever it takes my fancy.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N These seem to be all Daddies pics, so far. I guess that makes sense since it's the holidays right now. I may keep posting new dribbles whenever the mood strikes afterwards, though. I love these guys!_

Prompt: Gingerbread

The Great Divide

Kurt's fastidious nature meshed well with little Beth's careful thoughtfulness when the Hummel family made Christmas cookies. Bas would tease and make a mess, but he was outnumbered, so when it came to delicately tracing icing on snowflakes or imitating clothes on gingerbread men, he gave in and left the art up to his two artists.

When their second child BB was old enough to help, all bets were off.

"Red! Want the red!" BB shouted.

"Inside voice," Kurt said yet again.

"You can't make red snowflakes!" Beth argued, grabbing the piping bag from her brother.

"I like red!"

"Papa," Beth whined.

"It's a sunset snowflake," Bas stated, taking the bag and helping BB outline the cookie.

Kurt sighed. Bas had an excuse for everything. He was finally getting back at Kurt for taking over the Christmas baking. And decorating. And shopping. And wrapping. And...

Beth helped Kurt wash the fine tip for the white icing, and turned back to get back to work.

"Daddy, no!" Beth cried.

Kurt whirled. Bas and BB had cut one leg off of each of four gingerbread men.

"Bas!"

Sebastian looked at Kurt innocently.

"What. They're pirates!"

"Ohmygod..."

"Beth's angel needs red!" BB shouted.

"-don't you dare!"

"-Inside voice!"

"-maybe not."

Eventually, Kurt and Beth conceded defeat. They retreated, and after Bas and BB fell asleep on the sofa from their sugar crash (they ate as many as they decorated), Kurt revealed a dozen more cookies that they quietly and perfectly decorated together.


	2. Chapter 2

Prompt: Fair

What it Means to Be Bas's Kids

"Rrwwaaar! I'm going to slay the dragon!" BB shouted, brandishing the foam sword from the fair Bas had taken him to that day.

"We're going inside now, bud, let's keep that voice quiet," Bas suggested, hanging onto the loop on the top of the backpack his son wore. They headed down the escalator to the subway platform.

Once they were on the train, Bas pulled BB onto his lap and told him a story quietly in his ear while they rode toward home. If he didn't keep the rambunctious and creative four year old occupied, the boy would be all over the subway car talking to people and showing off his weapon.

By the time they had walked from the station to their apartment building, BB's energy was waning. The boy stumbled over the threshold into the lobby, and Bas reached down and swung him into his arms to carry the rest of the way.

Kurt was there to take the dozing boy off his husband's hands the moment they came in the door.

"Has he eaten dinner?" Kurt asked softly.

"He ate most of a turkey leg and some corn on the cob about an hour ago," Bas replied, kissing Kurt's cheek and tugging BB's backpack off of him.

"I'll get him straight to bed then, honey. You should talk to Beth." Kurt inclined his head toward the living room.

Bas went into the kitchen and dropped his own backpack on the counter so Kurt could put away the veggies he'd purchased, the continued into the living room and flopped onto the sofa next to Beth. He put his tired feet up on the coffee table, and she huffed disapprovingly.

"How'd the competition go today?"

Beth sighed. She sounded much older than her nine years. "I mixed up that footwork sequence."

"Yeah?"

"But... I came in second anyway!" She squealed, switching from a sad moue to a grin. Bas laughed and hugged her.

"Congratulations, honey! You are so silly trying to fool me."

" _Dad_ , don't call me silly."

"Okay. Ornery. Mischievous. _Mine_."

Beth giggled and snuggled into Bas's side.


	3. Chapter 3

Prompt: Charm

Sebastian Has a Daddy's Girl

"Sweetheart, these bruises are deep. Keep that ice on them, alright?" Kurt said, stroking his daughter's cheek.

"What? More bruises? What the hell?" Bas entered the room and saw his fourteen year old and his husband exchange a look. Kurt got up and drew Bas into the kitchen.

"She's training hard on a triple axel. It's a very difficult jump, Bas. This is normal."

"Bruises the size of a fucking dinner plate is normal? Give me a break, Blue Eyes," Bas snapped. "I know how those hurt, and I know how injuries like that affect you when you grow up! I'm sick of this!"

"Dad..." Beth stood in the doorway, her big eyes pleading. "You can't make me stop skating. I love it so much, and I'm good, Dad, I'm really good. This could be the year I go to nationals. I need a great season before I move to the senior level. Please, I don't mind the bruises!"

"Honey, he's not going to make you quit," Kurt reassured. He could feel Bas's tension easing at the puppy dog eyes Beth was giving.

"You don't get it. Injuries you get now can cause you pain decades from now," Bas argued.

"They'll be reminders that I am a survivor," Beth declared, raising her chin and looking so much like Kurt that Bas had to suppress a smile.

"Beth..."

"Eliza. I want to be called Eliza, Dad," the girl said, suddenly sounding exactly her age.

Bas sighed. He knew she loved figure skating. As a family, a lot of their schedules had revolved around the sport for years. But it was only this season that she'd taken her training to such a level that she faced injuries every time she stepped onto the ice.

"I'm going to go change. Put that ice on your bruises," Bas huffed, heading to the bedroom. He got out of his work clothes and into comfortable lounge pants and a t-shirt.

"Daddy?"

He turned from tossing his dirty clothes into the hamper. Beth rarely called him Daddy anymore.

"Eliza?"

She smiled at the name.

"I know Papa understands my need to compete. I want you to have a reminder of how important this is to me," she said, coming into the room and holding out a necklace to him.

The fine silver chain held a single charm on it, and Bas shook his head. "You can't give me that, honey. That was your grandma's. It was a really big deal for Grandpa to give it to you."

"I know. That's why I want to let you borrow it. Will you wear it this season for me, for luck and support?"

Bas rubbed his face with one hand. Kurt always teased him that it was a good thing Beth was such a great kid, because Bas couldn't refuse her anything.

"Okay."

She beamed as he took the necklace with the skate charm on it and slipped it over his head. He opened his arms.

"How does it look?"

Beth threw herself into his embrace, and he held her carefully.

"I love you, Eliza."

"I love you, too, Daddy."

Kurt tiptoed away from the door, smiling.


	4. Chapter 4

Prompt: Dare

Ohio Isn't the Real World

"Daaaddeee!"

Bas sprinted for the garage. BB's voice was strained and Bas was instantly panicked. His slick shoes skidded on the oily cement and he nearly collapsed in relief when he saw his son was safe, perched atop one of the automotive lifts. BB was crying, and nearly hysterical, but he wasn't hurt.

"Shh, buddy, I'm here," Bas said, walking over and reaching up. "Come on, let's get you down from there."

BB fearlessly threw himself into his father's arms, and Bas staggered at the weight of his seven year old. The child clung to Bas, sobbing into his neck. Bas stroked his hand up and down BB's back and walked out to the car. There would be no peeling the boy off of him to drive, though, so Bas pulled his phone out and quickly summoned help.

In five minutes, BB was calming down and Kurt arrived.

"What on earth is the matter?" Kurt exclaimed.

BB turned in Bas's arms and lunged for Kurt.

"Papa!" BB wailed, and started crying again.

"Hey, shh, no, you were fine a second ago with Daddy. Take a deep breath sweetheart."

BB obeyed and then started babbling in his high pitched voice. All Kurt could make out was "Beth," and "dare," and something that sounded like "pussy," but couldn't have been. Looking at his husband in confusion, Kurt glared when he saw Bas stifling a snicker.

"That's enough. BB, you get in your booster and Daddy will drive you back to Grandma and Grandpa's house. I don't want a word out of either of you until we're sitting in the living room all together. BB, deep breaths, okay. Think about what happened and when we're all sitting together, I want you to explain clearly and quietly what happened."

Bas tried to look contrite as he took BB and got him buckled into his booster seat in the back of their rental car, but he smirked at Kurt and opened his mouth to make some remark once their son was behind closed doors. Kurt raised his first finger.

"Not a word."

Kurt turned and climbed into the cab of his father's old pickup and drove straight back to the house.

"Elizabeth Antonia, come down here," Kurt called as soon as he stepped inside the door. He was glad his father and stepmother were out for the afternoon.

Once all four of the Hummel's were seated in the living room, Kurt asked BB what had happened. Even with the time he'd had to think about it, BB's account was confusing.

"So somehow you two thought it was okay to make Dad and I both think you were with an adult so that you could run off and play at the tire shop?"

"I babysit the Jackson's little girl; BB is just another kid! I'm responsible-"

Kurt arched one eyebrow and Beth cut off her protest.

"You're responsible for BB ending up alone in the shop ten feet in the air!" Bas pointed out. Beth blushed, folding her arms and slumping back in the chair, pouting.

"She dared me! She dared me and Milton Sanchez at school says if you don't do what you're dared then you're a puss-" BB shouted, with Kurt's finger pressed to his lips to stop the offensive word from leaving his son's mouth.

"Blaine Burt, you will not say that word ever again!" Kurt snapped. BB's eyes widened and he nodded.

Bas snorted and Kurt turned on him. "And you: be serious! What if he'd jumped down and gotten hurt?"

Bas nodded as solemnly as he could, and Kurt ignored how his eyes crinkled at the edges as he held back.

"BB, did getting stuck up on the lift teach you anything about dares?"

The little boy nodded. "It was dumb."

"Okay. Go change out of those clothes; they have shop grease and dirt on them. I'll teach you how to scrub that out later."

BB trudged up the stairs. Kurt turned to Bas, who nodded and focused on Beth.

"You dared him?" Bas asked. The humor was audible in his voice, and a small smirk twisted Beth's lips.

"He was driving me nuts. I just wanted some quiet time by myself to work on my routine," she said.

Bas shook his head. "Well, you'll have time to work on your routine for the rest of the visit, because you're not going to have your phone." He held out his hand.

"No, please, Dad! It's Ohio! There's nothing to do here, and this is my only contact with the real world!" The twelve year old sounded suspiciously like a teenager as she clutched at her phone.

Bas raised his eyebrows, and Beth pouted as she slapped it into his hand. He fiddled with it for a moment and them turned the device off. Beth looked like she'd lost her best friend.

"What did you set for my auto reply?" She asked apprehensively.

"'Beth endangered her brother and is grounded.'"

"This is humiliating!"

"I suggest you help me start dinner by washing the vegetables in the crisper," Kurt interjected, cutting the argument off.

Beth huffed and stomped to the kitchen.

Kurt covered his eyes and sighed.

"They're fine," Bas reassured him.

"I know. I just wanted this trip to be stress-free."

"Maybe we can get a little stress relief together later," Bas suggested, speaking quietly and moving close. Kurt chuckled.

"I've never felt less sexual than I do in my father's house with my kids in the next room, Sebastian."

"What if I dare you?" Bas breathed against Kurt's neck.

Kurt's laughter brought a complaint from Beth, asking him not to make light of her pain.

Kurt rolled his eyes, Bas nibbled his sweet spot, and Kurt agreed to the dare before he headed the kitchen to help Beth cook dinner.


	5. Chapter 5

Prompt: Music

The Origin of Success

Kurt and Sebastian stood at the boards while Eliza skated around, getting a feel for the music she was considering for her new long program.

Someone behind them tutted, and Kurt stiffened.

"It's not really her, is it? A little too pretty pretty princess."

Kurt frowned, but Bas turned.

"What would you know about it?" Bas asked.

"A lot, actually."

Kurt finally turned and his eyes widened. "Ohmygod."

"Really, well I'd like to see-"

"Bas," Kurt interrupted. "We should listen to him."

Sebastian scowled at Kurt, and tilted his head in uncertainty when his husband looked starstruck. He glanced at the short, pale stranger with the dark hair and imperious bearing and raised his eyebrows. The guy looked vaguely familiar.

"Mr Weir!" The music had stopped and Eliza skated over to them. "Ohmygod, thank you for coming! I can't believe you're here."

"Your letter was quite persuasive," the man replied.

"Hello. I'm Kurt Hummel. This is my husband Bas, and you seem to know our daughter Eliza. It's such a pleasure to meet you," Kurt said, offering his hand. "Bas, this is Mr Johnny Weir, former Olympic figure skater."

Everyone shook hands, and Bas relaxed.

"Eliza, you're not happy with that music, are you?" Johnny asked.

She sheepishly shook her head. "My uncle thought it would be good. He even recorded it in his studio, but..."

"What's on your most played list on your phone?"

"Um... I've been kind of obsessed with songs by trans characters. Hedwig, and the Angel and Collins duets from Rent... Paper Houses was this off Broadway show Papa took me to last year, and it has this amazing-"

"Okay. So find your music in that. If you have an uncle with a studio, well, you're luckier than most skaters. Play something you love and let me see you skate to it," Johnny ordered. Eliza skated off to where the sound controls were.

The three men waited, although both Bas and Kurt had questions about why and how the other man was there.

The Origin of Love began playing and Eliza's skating suddenly had more confidence than it had with the beautiful piano piece Blaine had made for her.

Eliza skated through the song, jumping at high points, spinning when the lyrics described the original sexes, and speeding through an improvised step sequence that had anger and beauty and passion saturating it.

Kurt's hand went to his open mouth in awe. He'd never seen his daughter skate that way. It was breathtaking.

The song ended and she came over to them again.

"Oh, sweetheart..." Kurt whispered. Bas wrapped him up from behind, seeing how overcome he was.

"Eliza, that was incredible," Bas added. Kurt nodded hard.

"It's a start," Johnny declared.

And that's how Johnny Weir became Eliza Hummel's coach.

 _A/N I'm a figure skating fan and I can't help but see the similarities between Kurt and Johnny Weir. I'll definitely be writing more of these two fashionistas!_


	6. Juniper's for Gin

_A/N I have been struggling with writer's block for months. These prompts have me writing again and I'm hoping I'll feel up to continuing some WIPs soon. Thanks for your patience!_

 _Prompt: Juniper's_

 _Warnings: f bombs_

 _Frame of reference: Set after Kurt and Bas are married and while their surrogate, Lari, is living with them during her pregnancy. The baby is biologically Kurt's._

Juniper's for Gin

Sebastian's face twisted up and he pulled a bit of food out of his mouth and set it on the edge of his plate, wiping his fingers off on his napkin and swallowing convulsively.

"Ohmygod, what the fuck is that?!" He complained.

Kurt looked up from his own meal. He frowned and raised an eyebrow. Bas gestured to the mashed, wrinkled little blue ball on the side of his plate.

"Oh! That's juniper."

"Uh, what the fuck?"

"Juniper's to take the gamey edge off the duck."

"No. Juniper is for gin. Full stop. This is nasty."

Kurt laughed. "Don't be so dramatic. There's very little in the sauce. If you see more, do what you already did."

Sebastian leaned back and folded his arms. "It's gross."

Kurt shook his head. "Fine. Don't eat it. Go hungry. But you're setting a bad example for the baby."

Bas looked incredulous. "Lari is in her room, Kurt, and I don't think the baby even has ears yet."

"It's the principle, Sebastian. We don't want a picky kid!"

"It's your kid, babe: it will be picky. There's no other option."

Kurt rolled his eyes and blushed. "I'm not picky. I just like what I like."

"Uh-huh. Sally."

Kurt glared. "I'm not that bad!"

"Do I need to call reinforcements? Blaine will agree with me. You know he will."

"No! Besides, Lari will agree with me!"

"Eric knows you're a picky bitch."

"Screw you, Bas!"

"Later, sweetheart. I'm gonna make some eggs."

Kurt shook his head as Bas moved to the kitchen, abandoning the meal Kurt had spent a full hour cooking.

"You're a big baby!" Kurt huffed.

"Yeah, and you're a picky bitch. But I love you anyway."

"Love you too. Asshole."

Bas just laughed.


	7. Yes, Dear

_A/N If anyone is interested in more of the explicit content, I have posted additional prompt fills on my AO3 for this verse._

 _Prompt: Two Holes_

 _Warnings: anal sex, dirty talk, language, defilement of linens_

 _Frame of reference: Kurt and Bas are married and have a toddler-aged daughter, Beth_

Yes, Dear

Being quiet so they wouldn't bring attention to themselves from their toddler was challenging for both Kurt and Bas, but when Kurt was bottoming, it was nearly impossible for him.

Bent over the bathroom sink, Kurt stared at his own reflection as Bas pressed into him. Biting his lips only worked to stifle his gasp at the first intrusion, and the hectic red of his cheeks only heightened as Bas spread him wide, splitting him open, stretching him until his jaw dropped and he sucked in a breath to cry out.

But Sebastian Hummel knew his husband, and he leaned across Kurt's strong back and hooked two fingers into his mouth just as the sounds were about to burst out of him. Kurt's lips closed around the digits and he drew them in, biting down. Bas grunted at his husband's use of teeth but smoothly started thrusting into Kurt, angling himself just right so Kurt's eyes fluttered closed.

"Jesus, Kurt, you're so beautiful like this: taking it in two holes, wanting me every way you can have me," Bas murmured into Kurt's neck, picking up the pace.

Eyes opening, Kurt met Bas's gaze in the mirror, rocking with the harder jabs with which Bas fucked him. It felt so good. They had been teasing each other all day with looks and little touches as they'd wandered the zoo with their daughter. Kurt had been so desperate that the moment Beth was asleep, he'd dragged Bas with him into the half bath off the living room, as far away from Beth's room as possible in their apartment, and dropped to his knees to blow him.

But Bas had been obsessively watching Kurt's ass in his tight pants as they moved from exhibit to exhibit, and so he'd only let the blowjob go so far before he'd hauled Kurt up and pushed him over.

Kurt's legs wobbled and his eyes closed, his back arching as his breath panted frantically through his nose while he sucked and chewed relentlessly on Bas's fingers to stifle his sounds.

Seeing Kurt's struggle with his approaching orgasm made Bas's balls tighten, and he humped faster, biting his own lip. With his free hand he reached under Kurt's chest, intending to jerk him off, but he detoured and pinched Kurt's nipple first.

Kurt had been hanging by a thread, so worked up that the stimulation on his prostate had him riding the fine edge of almost. The unexpected pain/pleasure of his nipple being pinched shattered his control, and he wailed and came in blinding pulses, jerking and twitching on Bas's cock.

"Shit!" Bas muttered, covering Kurt's gaping mouth with his red, throbbing, spit-slick fingers, trying to muffle the scream even as the ripples of muscle spasms around his dick milked his own climax from him.

For the endless moments of ecstasy, they writhed together, then they simultaneously held their breath and tried to listen over their pounding hearts for any indication that Beth's sleep had been disturbed.

Kurt breathed first, dropping his forehead against the cool porcelain of the edge of the sink.

Bas ran a hand down his husband's spine as he straightened his back and carefully pulled out. Kurt gasped and goosebumps raised his skin, so Bas snagged the hand towel from its hook by the sink and gently wiped the excess lube and fluids from Kurt's ass.

"Sebastian! That's the guest towel!" Kurt hissed, standing abruptly and snatching it away from him.

"So? We'll wash it."

"I'll know where it's been, damnit! There's toilet paper right there: why would you-"

Bas laughed silently at Kurt's exasperation and kissed the words away.

"I love you, you prissy weirdo."

Kurt sighed and tried to glare, but Bas's eyes were positively glowing with the truth of his words, and Kurt couldn't bring himself to keep scolding him.

"These are no longer guest towels," Kurt warned. "They're for our bathroom only. I'll have to buy new ones for in here."

Bas just shook his head and kissed him again.

"Yes, dear."


	8. It's All About Trust

_Prompt: Peak_

 _Warnings: language_

 _Frame of reference: future fic: Kurt and Bas are married, with two kids, Beth, a teenager, and BB, around 9. Kurt is a successful fashion designer and Bas is a stock broker._

It's All About Trust

"Hey, Papa, maybe you should slow down a little, huh?" Bas said through gritted teeth, invoking Kurt's parent-name.

"No, Daddy! Faster, Papa!" BB crowed from the back seat.

Beth huffed, her teenaged annoyance palpable.

Bas gripped the door of their rental car, a performance machine he'd been enjoying driving around Colorado Springs during the family's vacation.

"Calm your tits, Dad," Kurt said, smirking, using Bas's favorite slang from their early days together. The term was laughably outdated and Bas groaned in response, then gasped as the passenger side wheels edged closer to the drop-off as they rounded another turn.

"Kurt, will you please take it easy? Do you see how high the cliff is on this side?" Bas muttered.

"Geez, babe, you'd think you don't trust my driving!"

"I trust you with my heart and my family and my money and my soul, Kurt, but you have never driven a road like this before! _Shit_!"

Gravel made the tires slip and Bas's voice went up into Kurt's range.

"Daddy! Swear jar!" BB giggled.

"I will pay for this whole goddamned trip if Papa will just _slow the fuck down!"_

Finally easing up on the gas pedal, Kurt howled with laughter at his husband's antics.

"You know I'll hold you to that, right?" Kurt told him, giggling breathlessly as he navigated the next curve.

"Kurt I swear to fu-"

Kurt slapped Bas's thigh lightly.

"Enough cussing, Dad. Or you'll end up paying for the entire Hummel-Hudson-Anderson-Blake clan to spend Christmas in the Swiss Alps," Kurt warned.

"I want to learn to ski!" BB said.

The next turn brought the car close to the drop-off again.

"Godda-"

"Don't make me add the Gilbert-Hershbergers to that!"

"But Elliott and Tony have six kids now! And all three triplets bite!"

"So you better watch your mouth."

"Guys are such idiots. Dad, there's a safety light that keeps flashing under Pop's thumb. The car won't let us fly off the road," Beth snarked from behind Kurt.

Bas's jaw dropped. "You turned off the audible. You sneaky son of a-"

One raised eyebrow silenced Bas. He hated getting bitten by Elliott's kids.

Kurt smiled and reached to hold Bas's hand.

"They completed installation of the sensors on this road last year, and I made sure this model of Audi was compatible."

Bas shook his head and saw the safety indicator light on the steering wheel light up on the next curve. The car would turn it's own wheels and even stop itself to keep the vehicle safely on the pavement and away from the cliff, as well as maintaining distance from boulders on the other side if a driver tried to hug the inside too much.

As they finally reached the parking area at the top of Pike's Peak and they all climbed out into the thin air at 14,114 feet. The kids walked ahead and Bas grabbed Kurt's hand and leaned in.

"I can't believe you got me that good."

Kurt chuckled and squeezed Bas's hand.

"I can't believe it took nearly the entire drive to get you to catch on; or for Beth to rat me out, anyway. You really don't follow the advancement in automotive technology, do you?"

"I know that the stocks for manufacturers who aren't on the cutting edge take a dive every time there's a big pileup that makes news," Bas grumbled.

"See? We all have our specialties."

"You're a fashion designer!"

"Whose dad is a retired mechanic."

Bas gave up. They walked toward the building at the peak, drawn by the offer of coffee on the sign.

"Jeez, it's fucking cold up here," Bas muttered. Kurt grinned evilly.

"Did I tell you Dad and Carole are fostering two more teenagers? Do you think that means enough people for it to make sense to just charter a private flight to Switzerland?"

Bas groaned and dropped his head on Kurt's shoulder, closing his eyes and trusting Kurt to lead him to the cafe.


	9. Where or When

_Prompt: Aborted_

 _Warnings: none_

 _Frame of reference: Assumes all of Beyond His Control, and is set between the final numbered chapter and the epilogue._

Where or When

Bas knew he wanted to spend his life with Kurt from before Blaine left them.

He realized that he wanted to marry Kurt and have tangible proof that Kurt was his and only his when they came back to Ohio together during the summer after Bas's first year of college.

He proposed the first time on New Year's Eve that year. But Kurt was drunk, and instead of replying, he vomited. That had shaken Bas. He tried not to see it as a sign, but it took him a while to work up the nerve to ask again, especially since Kurt didn't remember it at all.

Kurt's birthday that year, Bas went all out. He took Kurt to Paris, to the theater, to dinner, and on a moonlit walk along the Champs-Élysée.

He never asked, because Kurt complained about a bridezilla they had seen earlier that day, and Bas had lost his nerve, thinking Kurt maybe didn't believe in marriage after all.

The last time Bas proposed was at the Fashion Institute of Technology, in the museum.

Kurt said no.

There were reasonable discussions about it afterward about statistics of marriage failure when the couples were too young and days of reassurances from Kurt that he loved Bas and wanted to be with him, but that was the final time Bas asked anyway. He even returned the ring he'd bought, figuring that if they ever did get married, they'd be older, that their tastes might have changed, and Bas didn't want his disappointment to taint the symbol Kurt would wear for the rest of his life.

Kurt nearly asked Bas on the day of Bas's college graduation. He was so proud of his boyfriend, and so in love as he listened to Bas's speech. As soon as the ceremony was over, Bas approached Kurt, with Burt and Carole there to support Bas like he was their son already, and the words almost flew from Kurt's lips.

But Bas had swept Kurt into his arms and kissed him, and then Burt had been there hugging Bas, then Carole, who was crying and telling the new graduate how proud she was, and Kurt had missed his moment. Later, he'd realized that it was for the best. A marriage proposal was an event to plan, not something to be done on the spur of the moment. He'd considered doing it that night or the next day when they'd arrived at the resort upstate they were going to in order to celebrate, but the car accident on the way had blown the whole trip and scrubbed that plan, too.

The next time Kurt almost proposed, it was after the successful launch of his line, when orders (along with more money than Kurt had ever earned) had flooded in. An extravagant meal out, dancing at the Rainbow Room, and rose petal- littered apartment when they went home afterward: it might have been perfect. But while Kurt had worked on his nerves in the kitchen, getting the bottle of champagne ready to serve Bas, with the ring tied to a ribbon around the bottom of one glass, Bas's mother had called, and the plan had fallen apart.

For months afterward, Kurt wished he could just do it over dinner, or breakfast, or after sex. But his desire for a memorably dramatic moment kept him silent, and the ring tucked in the recesses of the coat closet shelf.

Meeting a Japanese designer whose daughter was folding origami cranes for a sick friend led to the final plan, perfectly executed right under Bas's nose, and the following year they were married: Mr and Mr Kurt and Bas Hummel.

And throughout their lives, they both agreed that no matter when or if it had ever happened, they would have been together through it all anyway. Love was what mattered, not the ceremony or the proposal or the law. And they had that in spades.


	10. It's Not What You Think

_Prompt: A new low_

 _Warnings:language_

 _Frame of reference: Kurt and Bas are married, and Bas is a stock broker._

It's Not What You Think 

The phone rang.

"Bas Hummel," Sebastian answered, without looking at the caller ID. He was hot on the trail of a news story in France that was going to spike a particular stock if it was true.

"I need you-" a deep, rough voice growled in Bas's ear, interrupted by a hacking cough.

"Excuse me? I think you have the wrong number."

He clicked a promising link.

"Bas, I deed you to- shit!" The low voice broke into another coughing fit.

"Man, you should be calling a doctor not a broker, alright?"

Bas scanned the online article he'd found, speaking distractedly and preparing to hang up.

"I'b calling by fugging husbadd!" The man on the phone snapped, his tone breaking on the last word and rising so Bas finally recognized Kurt's voice.

"Oh shit, babe! I'm sorry! God, you sound like Barry White drowning in snot."

"Thang you, shithead. Bring hobe orgadic orange juice. Sood."

"Yeah! Yeah, will do," Bas nodded, typing an email in French to a man he knew at the newspaper in Nice.

"Sebastiad!"

Bas clicked send.

"Yes, Kurt, I got it. Organic orange juice. I'm on my way."

"Doh pulp."

"Yeah, no pulp, fresh squeezed," Bas said, standing and putting on his suit jacket. "I know what you like, hon. I'll bring you egg drop soup from Peking-Tokyo Express, too. I've just got to follow up on this lead for tomorrow's opening in Europe, but I can do that in the cab."

"Thang you, Bas."

"You're welcome, love. See you soon."

Bas rose, closing his laptop and throwing it in his bag, pulling his suit jacket on, and headed for the door.

He knew how he'd find Kurt when he got home: curled up on the couch wearing the red, wool blend union suit (that Bas had only once dared call an adult onsie), the lopsided afghan from Carole over him, drinking tea with lots of honey from a mug (world's best mommy, with a tiny Kurt handprint in green) that had been his mom's. If he was particularly cold or feverish, Kurt would also have a Hummel Tire and Lube hoodie on. All those items lived on a cedar shelf in their closet, just for when Kurt needed comfort.

Bas had asked him once why there wasn't anything from himself within the comfort stash. Kurt had shaken his head and replied that each of those items was a substitute for someone (the union suit was from Blaine), and what he needed more than anything else when he was sick was his real life love.

So Bas happily dropped everything and hurried home with the requested (or demanded) items to be Kurt's life-sized teddy bear.

Every time.


	11. The Things We Do for Love

_Prompt: Calibri_

 _Warnings: language_

 _Frame of reference: after college, pre-marriage_

The Things We Do for Love 

"It's too basic."

"No, look at it italicized."

"It's boring."

"It's easy to read. That Mademoiselle Camille is so flowery it's illegible."

"But what about the La Compagnie Des Ombree. It's minimalist."

"Kurt. You just like the French names. That font looks like a teenage boy wrote it!"

"Bas, you're being difficult."

" _I'm_ being difficult? _Me_? Ohmygod, you've gotta be kidding me."

"I want our wedding invitations to look special, Bas! I want our whole wedding to be undeniably _us_."

"Blue Eyes, _I'm_ part of us. How about I get some input?"

" ... "

"You choose the cardstock, the double envelope thing, the embossing, the little tissue square: whatever. I want our guests to be able to read our damn names and where and when they need to show up!"

"It's the _default_ , Bas. We aren't default!"

"Italicized, it's legible and pretty and minimalist. This is the only thing I'm asking for on the invites."

"Ugh."

"Well?"

"Calibri? _Really_?"

"Uh-huh."

" _Fine_."

"I love you, Kurt. Even when you're a controlling bitch."

"Hrmph. Love you too."


	12. Taint Misbehaving

_Prompt: Tainted_

 _Warnings: mild language, misappropriation of innocent mis-quoting_

 _Frame of reference: Married Kurtbastian with two kids_

Taint Misbehaving

" _Touch me baby tainty love, touch me baby tainty love..._ "

The sound of BB singing in his room woke Kurt and Bas, and they looked at each other.

"It's 5am. Why is your son awake and singing?" Kurt mumbled.

There was a thump, and another, and the sound of the boy repeating the refrain over and over.

"Sounds like he's dancing, too," Bas said, rising onto his elbows. "And why is it when he's being a shit he's mine and when he's being good he's yours? I think that's something we need to discuss, babe."

Kurt grunted and started dozing. Bas nudged him.

"He's not going to go back to sleep. And we really don't know what he'll get into if we don't deal with him."

"I don' wanna," Kurt moaned into the pillow.

"Come on. You make coffee and breakfast and I'll wrangle the little dude."

Kurt sighed heavily and rolled over, kicking at the covers to free his legs.

"Coffee."

Bas chuckled.

Later, after dropping BB off at his Saturday play group, the Hummels returned home. Beth was at a figure skating camp, so the husbands had their apartment to themselves.

Kurt was in the kitchen going through the refrigerator to remove old food and figure out something creative to do with the bits and bobs that were left over from the previous week.

" _I love you though you hurt me so... Now I'm gonna pack my things and go... Tainted love... Touch me baby, tainted love... Touch me baby, tainted love..._ "

The sound of Bas singing drifted to Kurt and he tossed the liquefying remnants of baby greens into the trash and went to find him.

Bas was folding laundry in BB's bedroom, dancing around as he slid to the toddler's dresser to put his shirts away before spinning back to the basket on the old changing table that they needed to get rid of now that BB was potty trained.

Kurt leaned against the door frame.

"You could sing more than the chorus," Kurt suggested. Bas looked over his shoulder.

"I don't _know_ more than the chorus," Bas replied. He turned and moved toward Kurt, swinging his shoulders in an exaggerated eighties bop, trying to get Kurt to dance with him.

"We really need to put some different music on to get that song out of our heads," Kurt said.

"I don't know, BB's version kinda works for me."

Bas started rolling his body against Kurt's, letting Kurt feel that he was getting hard.

"That's just disturbing," Kurt said, making a face.

" _Tainty love... Tainty love..._ " Bas sang. He leaned in closer and whispered in Kurt's ear. "I love your taint."

Kurt giggled in spite of himself. "Bas, that is... Is that _really_ what BB singing made you think of? _Ohmygod_..."

Bas wrapped his arms around Kurt and wiggled, moving both of them toward their bedroom.

" _Touch me baby, tainty love... Touch me baby tainty love..._ "

And with that wildly inappropriate initiation, Bas spent the afternoon showing Kurt exactly how inspired he'd been by the innocent mis-quoting of the 80's song.


	13. Compromises

_Prompt: Mud and Milk_

 _Warnings: mild language_

 _Frame of reference: Bas and Kurt are engaged_

Compromises

"Dancing and drinking every night makes it even more imperative to detox and relax each day, Bas."

"I don't want to party every night of our honeymoon, and I don't want a spa treatment every day, either!"

Kurt's eyes lit up. "But you do want spa treatments? You'll come with me? There's couples massage, and a mud bath, a milk treatment, hot stone-"

Bas laughed. "You are such a hedonist, Blue Eyes."

"When we're 80 and _I_ look 40, you'll appreciate how much I've taken care of myself," Kurt stated. His chin rose and he raised an eyebrow in that perfect, imperious look he had.

Bas's eyes dropped and he froze, taking a deep breath to subdue his emotions.

Kurt moved closer and took one of his hands.

"My boy," Kurt murmured. "That's what getting married means to me, you know. A whole lifetime together. Kids and grandkids and old people sex and retiring someplace funky. You're the one I want that with. I want to be with you forever."

Bas made a choked sound in his throat and pulled Kurt into his arms, burying his face against his fiancé's neck and trying to keep his tears in check.

When the swell of emotions crested, Bas squeezed Kurt tight and finally drew back.

"See, you're spending all this time taking care of your skin and shit, and I'm just gonna get plastic surgery. We'll both look fabulous but I won't have had to waste weeks of my life applying toner and five different moisturizers and three eye creams and-"

Kurt glared. "But I'll still look like me, not some Ken doll version of myself! You're lucky I love you for who you are and not just your gorgeous face, because you will not look like a forty year old version of you, you'll look like a plastic caricature."

"You..." Bas shook his head. "You always have to be right." His eyes narrowed in thought. "So I will do five of those spa things with you. And we'll do five of the things I want to do, and with two whole weeks for the trip, that leaves us just enough time to fill the rest of the days and nights with newlywed sex. How's that sound?"

Kurt laughed. "It sounds perfect."


	14. Right Now: Shower

_Prompt: Booked_

 _Warnings: none, unless it's a trigger warning for a non-explicit car accident_

 _Frame of reference: Bas just graduated college_

 _A/N My beta reader wanted the story of the car accident when the Porsche was totaled after Bas's graduation, and this prompt fit so that's where I'm going._

Right Now:Shower

Kurt woke at the sound of wailing tires skidding across wet pavement.

" _Bas_!" Kurt screamed, and then everything was noise and pressure and darkness.

Sebastian had encouraged Kurt to sleep on the way to the gay resort upstate after Bas's graduation. Since Burt and Carole had been in town, Kurt had been stretching himself thin and not sleeping enough while he spent time with them and prepared the graduation celebration. So Bas told him to sleep while he drove.

But Bas hadn't been resting enough either. He was just as exhausted as Kurt, and when they were on the winding road outside Albany, his eyelids had grown so heavy that one long blink was all it took.

The ambulance took them both to the hospital. Kurt had to be checked out further since he'd lost consciousness briefly, but they were released that same night.

They needed to find a hotel, and the fates were not on the couple's side.

A perfect storm of conventions, concerts, and events had every hotel they called booked.

"Um, I found a place," Bas said. They were sitting in a cafe across the street from the ER.

"So call a taxi and let's go," Kurt said dully. At nearly one in the morning after everything, he was certain he looked like an extra from The Walking Dead. He wasn't sure yet if he was a zombie or a survivor, though.

"They, um. They rent the rooms hourly."

"You better have reserved at least ten hours."

Bas looked at him. "Of course. But... You know what kind of motels rent by the hour, right?"

"I don't care. Bas, this is me so far beyond caring I can't even."

"Um, okay."

It was the most revolting establishment Sebastian had ever set foot into. And he'd frequented Scandals before he'd gotten involved with Blaine and Kurt, so that was saying something.

Kurt stumbled over the tear in what was left of the carpet where it was worn through just inside the door, and Bas steadied him. Far beyond exhausted, Kurt dropped face down on the bed before rebounding back up with a near shriek. He was suddenly wide awake.

"What did I just touch? _Ohmygod_ , Bas!"

"Blue Eyes, I tried to tell you..."

Bas pulled the bedspread off, but the stains on the sheets didn't make the bed any more appealing.

Improvising, Bas grabbed the two bags that held all the clothes the two had packed for the weekend getaway. Kurt's valise of his personal care products had burst open and scattered all over the interior of the Porsche and the first responders hadn't been willing to wait while Bas gathered it all back together. He'd been lucky they let him take the suitcase and backpack.

From the backpack came his shirts, and he spread them out on the dirty sheet, creating a space for Kurt to lay down. He'd lay on the lumpier cargo pants and jeans. Kurt's microfiber face towel was in the outside pocket from when Bas had gotten impatient and crammed it in when Kurt said he needed to repack a third time to get it added to his valise.

That would keep Kurt's face from having to make contact with the pillow. Bas grabbed a towel from the bathroom that looked like it had maybe been left there by housekeeping for his own pillow.

The spike of disgust that had roused Kurt faded quickly and he tearfully hugged Bas in thanks before he curled up on the shirts and was instantly asleep.

Bas locked the doorknob but growled a little when he saw that there was no deadbolt and the chain had ripped out of the wall, the mount still attached where it rattled against the flimsy door.

The only chair in the room looked like it wouldn't be any assistance at all in securing the room, but Bas put it in front of the door anyway.

Then he about collapsed onto the bed.

At one point, Bas was awakened by the door opening and the chair falling over.

"Get out!" He shouted, half awake but sitting up before he decided to do so, his heart beating fast and loud, and the door closed.

Bas looked at Kurt and shook his head. He was still asleep.

The next day, they rented a car and found the impound where the Porsche had been taken. Kurt was able to gather as many of his loose bottles and jars as he could and Bas let him pack them into his backpack. The clothes they had slept on had been abandoned.

Sore and tired, they returned to their apartment rather than continuing their romantic getaway.

"I am going to take the hottest shower possible and scrub myself until I'm raw. I'm going to have to burn these clothes-"

"I'm sorry," Bas interrupted.

Kurt looked at him for a long moment, then went to him and cupped his face.

"I love you. And once I'm not crawling with the vilest bacteria known to man, I truly believe we will have the most entertaining story to tell for the rest of our lives. But right now: shower."

Bas watched Kurt walk down the hall, relieved and overwhelmed.

Then he followed after him.

Shower.

 _A/N My brother experienced the hourly motel incident I depicted, many years ago. His was actually worse but I didn't want to describe the bathroom. Yikes!_


End file.
